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Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Hopes dashed!

Everyone here was so excited to hear that there was a chance for the kids to come here from NYC on the 16th (delivered by their other grandparents who had business here).  This might have given us a little more time with the kids, they could see everyone - more than their dad - whom they miss.  And they could spend Christmas in Utah as the Commissioner said they should.  The kids could attend the Christmas Eve party with Grandma B and cousins, Christmas Day with their dad and grandparents, and the day after Christmas for a special dinner with all the Utah cousins as well as some other activities to make the time special - movies and popcorn, etc.  It also costs considerably less to come from NYC than from SC (assuming the tickets could be purchased early).  It would have meant a few missed school days for the kindergartener, but what is more important - school or time with her father?  Last year we postponed Christmas by a day so everyone could share the time with the girls because they weren't required to come until the week after.  I have postponed my vacation requests waiting to see when they will come since I will be helping with them when Jon is at work.

Now the winds have changed.  Their new offer is for Jon to come to NYC (with the people who have supported the injustices of this situation) to see his children.  It is a generous offer to help him to briefly see the children, but he works Christmas Eve as well as the Monday following Christmas.  This is the life of working people - especially those in retail.  He has been able to land a full-time position as a portrait photographer even in this terrible economy and he cannot jeopardize that by leaving at a critical and very busy time.  He also has no paid vacation time to take off.  This job also provides her with money so why would she want to risk that?

The video quality is poor when they Skype but the saddest part of that is that two year olds (and babies and five year olds) do not get the father time they crave via 60 minutes a week by video. They cannot even comprehend the distances involved. The problem is that she insists on living in S.C. when there is no good reason to do so except keep the children from their father.

It is just plain tragic, all around.  Is it any wonder we are frustrated here?

2 comments:

  1. I hope we can see all three kids for Christmas! I would be happy for Jon if he were able to go to NY to see them, because I know how much he misses them, but we miss them too. I hope I get to hug and kiss my little Liz and Madi bugs and I REALLY hope I get to finally meet Barrett! He's so cute and Max would love him. :)

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